"I can't do this."
Claim in your [own] words
(weakness of the positive/negative)
Questions from the judge(andjury)
"And the court decides..."
The Suicide of the VirginAugust is the cruelest month, breeding
Cypress on the campus, mixing
Change and unfamiliarity, stirring
Poison into these drinks.
The promise of demise kept my heart warm, covering
Sorrow with plastered smiles, feeding
An insightful mind with rotting tubers.
Death came quickly, jumping from the highest building.
In that soft rain; I came to a halt on the concrete,
My memories of you in the sunlight, my last thoughts,
And how we sat in the stairwell, for hours talking.
Wie werden uns wiedersehen.
When I was young, staying with my grandfather,
Poor widower, he took me on a walk,
and I was happy. He said, Maria,
Maria, listen to me. And he told me never to fear death.
For it is inevitable, a part of life.
I went home and contemplated what it meant to die.
Why does this feeling clutch at my heart, why does it grow
from what was once full of love? I am but a daughter of man.
And I know not much more than the fact
that I am broken, an image of what has been.
And death merely gives the
WretchWretched soul, wretched soul.
The clock strikes four-
but never moves.
You look to the window,
for the ones you have lost
(begging for the pity of your womb).
Alone you'll perish;
Empty as a dusty cellar.
And although the fault lies with only you,
it is something you shall never understand.
:R a i n:The rain fell endlessly from the sky, each drop rhythmically hitting the old roof. It was especially audible from the attic in which I sat, watching the rain hit the lake from the singular, cracked window in the dusty room. Slowly, I traced nonsensical figures on the window, using the fog made from my damp breath as a form of paint. Staring at it for a moment, I suddenly became incredibly unhappy at my art and wiped it away with my jacket sleeve.
That was when I noticed a figure walking to the lake shore, small from where I sat but seemed like a girl in her late teens. Slowly, ever so slowly, she walked into the water, until she was waist deep. She looked to the sky, her now sopping wet hair sticking to her face. Thinking back, she seemed to gather some form of… Courage from whatever she found in that rainy sky, before she peacefully sank into the water. The villagers didn’t find her until it was much too late.
“That’s the fifth one this year,” I murmured
WinterThese oceans of blood,
consuming my soul.
Like sheep to the slaughter,
fear seeps into my bones.
I ponder the meaning of the few
seconds my life is
in the wake of these magnificent
my pockets are empty and my
mind is blank.
GrudgeMonsters crawl from the depths
of my soul.
I find my mind cannot take the horror
of years past,
while my heart pleads for silence
[that I can't find]
A step above the restLook down at me from above
(atop that towering plain) -
and wonder why all those ants
gnaw at you 'till you're falling like a
wave crashing to the shore
of some long-lost
my sun-bleached bones lay upon the
He only dates broken girls.I will destroy you. I will
make you love me
without even trying;
you’ll love the scabs
on my knees, the bruises
under my eyes, my
singed hair. You will love
the rush of holding
my hand as we cross
the bridge; you’ll feel
like a hero each time
I don’t jump. You will buy
me chocolates, the most
expensive, to guilt me
into eating. You will buy
me seeds instead of flowers,
to give me a reason to
get up in the morning. You
will make me dependent,
even as I feed your white
knight complex. I will destroy
myself, and so you,
and you will know why storms are named after people.
ReflectionI want to sprinkle a piece of me
Into bit-code hoping it sticks.
But no one cares about the truth
Unless it's funny.
And I've lost sight
Of what that is;
I've been taught that it's all relative.
We're all irrelevant in the end
And so, the fire that use to burn in my heart
Is all Charcoal. And I've been trying
To see with no eyes; to drive with
But now I know I want to melt
Together people's 90 degree angles,
Until the world knows everyone's rights.
I want to melt together the distance
That separates prose and poetry;
Fact and Fiction; light and darkness.
While You Were SleepingWhile you were sleeping
to whisper about you jealously
in their tiny little chain gang
bigger, badder, better.
While you were sleeping
their undying bond of friendship
and every face hardened
sadder, snider, solid.
While you were sleeping
conspiracies rose and fell
with your breath
and They rustled with laughter
more, malicious, mayhem.
While you were sleeping
Cancer shoved over other kids
in the playground
and took their place
suddenly, so, scared.
While you were sleeping
you were overrun
and we can fight it, of course,
with artilleries in the arteries
we'll, wield, weapons
but while you were sleeping
they took a misered,
into tumultous, tumourtuous, laughter
as you lay undefended
and they captured your heart.
Dead or alive?I feel numb
Is this death?
Or am I still alive?
If I'm alive
I shouldn't be
Because death is better
Than this cursed life
The Horror StoryMy horror should turn to grit that chokes the rusting cogs of passing breaths.
It should sneak into crevice and corner until each pirouette of a clock hand crunches
a desperate death rattle into the mid-December hysteria. It should.
I want my terror to ooze into the machinery of existence and permeate the iron.
I want it to coat, and coax wheels off their axels as my mind spins out of control.
The whole world should grind it's internal organs like black pepper. To a halt.
The stars should feel the chill of my desperation and slide sluggishly down the sides of the sky
dripping burning nitrous into our eyes that in turn melt out of their sockets.
I want every subatomic particle of life itself to suddenly stop, mid sentence.
This is the way the world should fall apart.
This is the way the world ends. This is the way the world ends.
Not with a bang but with a resolutely maternal voice, strong as gravity, growling "Cancer."
I want the world so still that I will see the traces of the dead le
Ignorant WisdomThe best of us die young
We are blood and body
Mind and muddled matter
That decays from the very air
Necessary like an addiction
Our eyes are skin and sinew
Senses intaking a surface
But to the machine of faults
What is there lost to us?
The best of us are of will
As what will be passed belief
The demanding of subconscious
Edicts of the soul
Then why do they die?
Why must a will be severed
When it drives our existence
All that there is
And will ever represent us?
Why do vessels feed the muscle?
Bones hold up our legs
And a head with strong neck
That its aspirations rise?
The best of us accomplish
Tasks of a higher calibre
Like a barrel of the cannon
One volley into the stars
They undertake with all motive
And lose the unwinnable condition
For through their demarcation
Revitalize our weak hearts
The best of us die young
Because they are not us
And remind us what we should be
Through the greatest league
Of history's lessons
They sacrifice their chance to live
As watcher of the